December 15

Everyone has dates that are important to them.  July 7 - August 27 - September 17 - January 27 - July 6 - February 21 - August 18 - March 6 - March 27 are just a few of mine.  Something life changing happened on each of those dates.  During certain seasons other days become incredibly important.  When I was in school the last day of the school year was uber important.  While I couldn't tell you the exact date now I certainly could back then.  When you are planning a big event like a wedding or expecting a baby or set a retirement date one of the most common questions that is asked is something along the lines of "how much longer?"  You are expected to be able to say the date and know how many months, weeks, or days until the event takes place.

Well I can tell you December 15 is just over two months away. 67 days to be exact.  Just a little over 9 weeks.  Can you tell I'm excited.

I hate wishing my life away.  But I can't wait for December 15!  Approximately 3 years ago Dennis and I started a journey - or rather Dennis started a journey that will finally conclude in December.  Once upon a time I had a dream.  I wanted the best for my husband and knowing his love of learning I thought he should pursue his masters degree.  I thought - oh this will be great for our family - job security and hopefully advancement and it will be great.  I got Dennis on board with my plan.  He says I didn't force him into it and that he wanted to get his masters.  He says that he has always wanted it but probably wouldn't have pursued it without someone encouraging him and supporting him.  I try to believe him.  I told him before he started to only do it if it was actually something he wanted because he is the one that has to be motivated to do the work not me.  But the guilt is still there.

He has done amazing.  He has passed every class so far with either an A or B I think.  He has worked so hard.  But the truth is - it sucks.  For three years straight I've dealt with loneliness and guilt and frustration.  The truth is that December 15th can't get here soon enough.  The longest break from school that Dennis has had in 3 years is something like 3 weeks.  He has taken summer classes, fall classes, spring classes.  He has given up coaching kids basketball, playing as much in worship team, sleep at nights, time with me and George among other things I probably don't even know about.  He has dealt with me.  A select few of you out there know exactly how hard that is.  I nag him, I yell at him for not helping much around the house and whine about how much I miss him and wish he didn't have homework.  I would have killed me 10 times by now if I were him.  The truth is he has been working harder than anyone I've ever seen before.

He stays up until 2 in the morning to finish his homework and still gets up with George when he wakes up at 5:30 in the morning.  He takes vacation time from work to do school work.  He listens to classes on his phone while we drive to the various activities that I force him to go to.  He listens to classes while he does yard work.  He takes George out with him to work on the garden so I can have a few minutes of time alone to make dinner.  I've never been so proud of him in the years I have known him.

Looking back I would make a lot of changes in how we "planned" this out.  I would have pushed him to start his degree earlier.  Like the spring of 2006 would have been perfect.  He would have just hired on full time with Deere and I still had a year of school yet.  No kids, no house to maintain, and we both would have been doing homework.  Assuming the same class schedule he would have been done sometime in 2009.  Just in time to start our family and have George.  But you can't go back and make yourself smarter.  So here we are with December 15 looming ahead.  It just can't get here fast enough.

This process has been harder than I ever imagined.  The U of I is one of the top computer science schools in the country.  While that is super good news when you have a degree from there it also means the classes are ridiculously hard.  I have listened to maybe a quarter of the lectures and I have NO IDEA what they are ever talking about.  I have tried not to complain (except to Dennis) about how awful and hard the last few years have been and I know a few people have gotten an ear full.  I appreciate all the encouragement that Dennis and I have received.  Any prayers that we make it the last 9ish weeks are also welcome.  This last semester is his hardest ever as he is taking two classes at the same time.  As soon as I get home from work he disappears into the office.  Often I take his dinner to him in there.  He comes out to put George down for bed and then goes right back to work...unless of course he has to rush off to worship team practice or if I'm throwing a fit...

on the hardest days I sit back pray for patience and calculate the months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds until December 15.

P.S. - there will be a party that day.  or maybe the 16th.  Probably just for QCA people given the time of the year.  But you better believe Dennis, George, and I will be partying.